Are you an MLM business owner and hoping to attract others on Facebook?

If so, it's quite possible you are sabotaging your efforts every single day without even realizing it.

Look, Facebook is an amazing way to get yourself out there and allow others to get to know you better.  Sharing some personal things about yourself on Facebook (your hobbies, your passions, your family) is a great way to increase your likability factor and draw people towards you.

But Facebook can also ruin your credibility very quickly if you're not careful.

To illustrate this point, let me introduce you to Chris, Nancy, Eric and Chloe.

Complaining Chriscomplainer image

Chris is the guy on Facebook who complains about EVERYTHING, like the entire world is against him.

He's always getting “ripped off” or wronged by someone or something.

  • He bought a training course that really stunk.
  • He hired an outsourcer that totally screwed him.
  • He bought all these cold leads that never called him back or even answered their phones… what a ripoff!

You see guys like Chris all over the Internet, especially on Facebook.  

He usually attracts “friends” who commiserate with his negative experiences and they all get together in a do-nothing FB group to complain about everyone and everything.

And by the way — Chris is making NO MONEY.

Negative Nancy

Nancy is Complaining Chris' long lost cousin.  

She's a lot like Chris, except that she turns all her negativity inwards.

You'll often find Nancy putting herself down…

  • “I'm no good at selling or prospecting.”
  • “I can never lose weight like those other women.”
  • “No one wants to work with me, I must have nothing to offer.”

Of course, Nancy is a bit extreme but you've probably met many negative people like her on Facebook or in your own life outside of social media.

What's your reaction to these people?

Do you want to be near them?

Probably not.  No one likes to be around someone who'se always putting themselves down.

And you certainly wouldn't want to work with them.

And by the way — Nancy is making NO MONEY.

Envious Eric

envy imageEric is seemingly a good guy; no, he IS a good guy.

But when someone near to him accomplishes something of significance, Eric feels compelled to minimize it.

I see it all the time on Facebook.

I'll be you do, too. 

 Here are some examples:

John won the affiliate contest!

Eric's response:  “Sure, I would win too if I had a list that size!”

Janis brought in 15 people into her new MLM business and was named Associate of the Month!

Eric's response:  “I'll bet she brought all those people with her from her previous company.  She cheated!”

Victoria generated 521 leads in one day using solo ads and is featured on her company's webinar.

Eric's response:  “Sure, look at the size of her marketing budget.  Anyone could do it with all that money!”

Eric is envious of anyone else's success and makes excuses for himself at every opportunity.

Someone else always has an unfair advantage over Eric and it just isn't fair!

And by the way — Eric is making NO MONEY.

Clueless Chloe

Chloe really isn't clueless, she just pretends to be.  She's actually lazy.

You see, Chloe would rather have someone else do the work for her rather than roll up her sleeves and do it herself.

Chloe asks questions of her sponsor like “how do I set up my back office and company websites?

Of course, Chloe never bothered to watch the start up videos; it's just easier to ask her sponsor.

Chloe doesn't understand what incoming links are, so she asks people in a Facebook group she belongs to, rather than just Googling it. 

It's just easier to ask rather than search for herself.

And by the way… Chloe is making NO MONEY,

 What do Chris, Nancy, Eric and Chloe all have in common?

Besides the fact that their businesses are making no money, they are all sabotaging themselves on Facebook by positioning themselves in such a way that NO ONE will want to work with them.

Unfortunately, there's a Chris, a Nancy, an Eric and a Chloe everywhere you turn on Facebook.  

They're the majority.

I don't think it's a coincidence that 90% of the money in MLM is made by 10% of the people  (my estimate).

These are the same people that are positioning themselves as leaders by having a positive self image, helping others and celebrating the successes of others.  

  • Be the person who takes full responsibility for all that happens in his business.
  • Be the person who believes in herself and projects that to others.
  • Be the person who is genuinely happy for others and learns from their successes.
  • Be the person who takes action and never depends on someone else to provide answers.

The Moral of the Story

Watch what you say on Facebook [or anywhere else for that matter].  Words are extremely powerful, as are the thoughts behind your words.

Before you hit the Return key, ask youself if this update or comment will help build you up or bring you down.

Are you positioning yourself as a leader or sabotaging your efforts?

Facebook is a great way to brand yourself online — as someone to Follow, or someone to avoid at all costs.

You choose!

    37 replies to "Are You Sabotaging Yourself on Facebook?"

    • Shiwangi peswani

      Hey Bob, landed here for the first time and must say that I am very much impressed with your writing style. Regarding your post yeah its true people usually fail to understand what they are posting on their facebook timeline and how it couls revert back to them. To be very honest I also did some such foolish update in faceook in my initial days there but soon I realized that such updates were acutally sabotaging my image.
      Though I am still a facebook addict but never make such mistakes again.

    • Debbie

      Totally agree with you Bob…I always think about EVERY post I place in Social Media and how it will be interpreted by others.
      Great FUN post…enjoyed it!

      • Bob

        Glad you liked it Debbie… it’s true… people are watching!

    • Cori Rizzo

      Great post Bob- it cracked me up. I have hidden or unfriended most people like that.

      • Bob

        But they keep coming back, right Cori…. just different people in the same hats 🙂

    • Adrienne

      What a great post Bob and I wish it weren’t true. I remember bumping into people like that in the past so I was definitely kind of chuckling over here. Sorry cause it’s really not funny.

      As most people have said, watch what you say and think. Not only on Facebook but period. What you put out there is definitely coming back your way and you’re right, that’s why most people fail. Those kinds of attitudes will never get you anywhere in life.

      Thanks for sharing this and welcome back. Have a wonderful weekend.

      ~Adrienne

      • Bob

        It IS funny to us, Adrienne because we’ve been trained to watch our words. But to people just jumping into the Home Business arena, they need to learn this stuff. It’s like watching a train wreck for some of these folks.

        Glad you enjoyed it… thanks for coming by once again.

    • Hannah Walker

      Great information Bob. Using Facebook, it is very important to watch every statement you are going to post because with just a little bad statement this could really ruin the good things you post on this social media.

      • Bob

        It’s a little like people running for public office, Hannah… people will always find stuff you said that will either contradict you or put you in a bad light.

        That’s why its so important to watch what you write and what comes out of your mouth.

        Appreciate the comment!

    • Sylviane Nuccio

      Hi Bob,

      This is a very interesting post. I love it, really 🙂

      Why do I love it so much? Because we all know a Chris, Nancy, Eric and Chloe, don’t we? The sad part is that those people are kind of blind to their own undoing. I only hope they could read this post and smell the coffee 🙂

      Thanks for this very creative and educative post.

      • Bob

        Thanks, Sylviane!

    • Sue Price

      Hi Bob
      This is such a great message and unfortunately a very necessary one. I see it all the time as you obviously do. I love your names here “complaining chris and negative nancy” etc. LOL
      It amazes me people do some of the things they do on Facebook so a great message here for them Bob.

      Sue

      • Bob

        It was a fun post to write, Sue! And you’re right… I think the electronic age allows people to post things online that they wouldn’t normally say or do otherwise.

        It’s the same problem I have with texting. Many people would never say some of the things they text to your face, you know?

        Thanks for the comment!

    • Sigrid McNab

      Thanks for the great reminder, Bob, that people are always watching you on Facebook. With a simple click of a button, you can boost somebody up or turn them off of you completely.

      • Bob

        So true, Sigrid… it’s a fine line sometimes. Just be yourself and always position yourself in the very best light. That’s the rule I follow online.

    • Maxwell Ivey

      Hi Bob; Another well written article my friend. I listened carefully to see if you were talking about me. For the most part I came out unscaved. I did realize that I’ve been leaning a little hard on someone. I’m generally a do it on my own kind of person, and taking help is often not easy. so once I decide to accept the assistance, sometimes i go a little too far the other way. still working with Lisa H on the new design for the site. thanks again and take care, max

      • Bob

        Glad you enjoyed it, Max. Thankfully, most people who visit and read my blog already seem to “get it”. But it’s always worth a reminder to watch how you position yourself online.

        Have a great day!

    • Juli Becker

      This was a fantastic read! Thankfully, I have chosen to align myself right from the get-go with leaders/movers and shakers of this industry on my Facebook profile. I love reading my Facebook feed because of it. There is always someone I can learn from, get pumped up about, and share valuable information with.

      Love this post!

      Juli

      • Bob

        That’s true… you can learn a lot by watching how the leaders in your Industry position themselves on social media. Watch their feeds, see how they mix up personal and business posts. It’s a great education.

    • John Rollow

      Great post, Bob. Putting those offenders into real characters in a story makes the lesson so much more memorable. I gotta figure out how to do that — storytelling hasn’t been a strong suit for me.

      • Bob

        It’s a process, John… just by being in Diane’s classes you’ll get better. She’s a master at storytelling.

    • Robert David Strong

      Hey Bob,

      What a great spin to put on a subject like this. We would have to say that we have run across all these types of individuals on Facebook, and we have even had a client or two that fell into these mindsets. We have to admit that even when we were starting we may had these thoughts, but as we continue to develop ourselves and become better, we then can share with people more, in turn giving us a better feeling about ourselves.

      • Bob

        Hi Robert… I think everyone makes these mistakes in the beginning; we just don’t know any better.

        But the sooner you learn that your words have power, the better…. your words can work FOR you or AGAINST you.

        Thanks for stopping by.

    • Johny Johnson

      So sad about this story. Well, I don’t actually used facebook rightnow since, I’m totally wasting my time their because it’s so hard to engage a followers. Unlike Twitter, you can engage easily and interact with them..

      • Bob

        If you’re having success with Twitter, stick with it. I find Facebook to work well, but it’s not everyone’s cup of tea.

        Thanks for the comment, Johny.

    • Donna Merrill

      Hi Bob,

      I loved laughing through this post because it is so familiar. There are always going to be those Negative Nellies out there. Worst is people who market by putting other businesses down. Yikes!

      Negativity will attract negativity. Where positive will attract positive. It is ok to do a silly rant now and then in a joking way. But always make sure we have the mindset that whatever we write is out there forever. We cannot take those words back.

      I love the cleaver names, I’m still laughing because they remind me of certain people I see on the Social Platforms.

      Thanks for this Bob.
      Donna

      • Bob

        I know, it’s crazy right Donna? We all see them out there and it’s like watching a train wreck.

        You know it’s gonna crash but you can’t do much about it.

        I’ve tried a few times to show these people how they’re showing up on FB, but they get upset so I stopped.

        Like many of us, they will have to learn the hard way, I’m afraid.

        Thanks for stopping by, Donna!

    • Sonia

      Wow! That was very cool. I have seen all of these people, but you forgot “Debbie Downer” too LOL! People like this, I stay clear from and keep them at a distance. I know there are certain things we all want to try and do, but what sucks is when people you trust can never and I mean NEVER be happy for you. They are suppose to be your support, your cheerleader, when the only person that should be doing that is YOU.

      It seems that these days like in my current post, either we are going to fast or too slow. I remember a post Adrienne did where she said, that she followed a program to the letter and how well it has worked out for her in the long run. Some of us try and skip through everything and wonder why it’s not working out for us.

      Same thing with blogs, people think they can throw up a blog in days and have loads of traffic and money just pouring in. It takes months if not years to get it right and most give up before they taste victory.

      Fantastic post Bob! The analogy was spot on and something I will remember myself.

      • Bob

        People always want things NOW, I guess. We are an impatient generation.

        I think that’s why I see so many people going from company to company on the Internet, looking for something that “works”.

        They ALL work (or most of them)… what doesn’t work is when people quit when results don’t come immediately.

        I feel a rant coming on.. better stop! LOL

        Thanks for the comment, Sonia. Great to see you again.

    • Stacy

      Hi Bob,

      It’s very important to watch what we say on Facebook in general but as marketers it is even more important. People watch what we share even if we don’t think that they do. I can’t count the times that someone started talking to me offline about something that I had posted on Facebook – and didn’t know that they had seen. Not that it was anything bad but it’s always a good reminder that many people see what we put out there even if they don’t “like” it or leave a comment.

      Stacy

      • Bob

        It’s so true, Stacy…. we never know who is watching us.

        I think this is especially important if we have prospects as friends on FB (and you should add them whenever possible). They are watching you to see how you relate to others, if you are respected and how you position yourself can mean the difference between them joining and not.

        Thanks for the comment!

    • Carol Lynn

      I had a good chuckle reading this, Bob. I know people like this in and out of business. I think Facebook did us a disservice by calling everyone “friends” because I’d guess that about 1% of the people we know on Facebook are actual friends. The rest are acquaintances, colleagues, clients, prospects and sometimes total strangers. We forget that they aren’t our friends and while it might be cool to sit around complaining all night about our crappy jobs, it’s NOT cool to do that online! We can certainly be FRIENDLY with people but there is a difference and we have to remember to treat people appropriately. Too many people make this mistake and they treat their social accounts like the office water cooler or their personal therapist and forget they’re speaking publicly.

      Good rundown of some of those “unhelpful” personalities! Maybe a few of them will read this and be inspired to do better!

      • Bob

        Absolutely, Carol Lynn! Be friendly, of course. Reveal a bit about your personal life (family pics, fun experiences, etc) but always remember that whatever you post is there for all your friends to see.

        The problem is this: what people used to gossip about on the phone or (as you said) at the water cooler, they’ve now taken online and are spewing it all over Facebook. It may satisfy their need to get it out, but it doesn’t portray them in a very good light to someone who may be looking at their business.

    • Larry Hochman

      Right on target, Bob! Easy to forget the BIG rewards in home business go to those who take responsibility and leadership…not unlike “real life” in that respect. Great examples!

      • Bob

        Thanks, Larry… been loving our conversations on this very topic.

        In many ways, these issues are not restricted to online… but, as you say are simply an extension of real life. If you were at your place of business and serious about getting a promotion, you’d probably not be spewing out all the latest gossip around your boss.

        When online, potential partners may be watching so it makes good sense to watch what we write on Facebook.

        Appreciate the comment.

    • Wade

      Great post Bob. I always say, watch what you say as you can never take your words back,. This is even more so when you put your words into writing.

      • Bob

        Exactly, Wade… look how emails are taking down some of the big names in Banking and other industries over the last couple of years. Your words can come back to haunt you!

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